Friday, December 30, 2011
For-NOW never for-EVER
It seems to me that I always seem to be the for-now girl. I meet someone and they seem interested and keep me around for a little (now) than just for some reason start avoiding me and loose interest just as fast as it started. My heart continues to crack with each one who walks away. I always seem to watching this familiar scene of someone who stole my heart and than walks away. It's a lonely scene really. What is it about me that I can only get NOW out of them? Why can't he fall for me the way I fall for him? Maybe just maybe I have a balance issue and need to just stop falling. How do I do this? Live in a bubble..yes that might work. Ok maybe not. I keep falling and falling and I am totally sick of it. I am sick of being the one always cracked and hurt. Bandaids just don't cut it anymore. Maybe for-ever is just not for me. I am not going to have that kind of love. I just don't know how many for-nows I can handle. I just don't want now any more I want ever!!